The Dreaded ‘What If’

I used to think that I had no regrets. That whatever life gave me, I welcomed with open arms.

Now I think if anyone tells you they have no regrets, they’re probably lying.

There are days and minutes and flashes that I wanted to go back and change. I wanted to replace the words I carelessly threw to someone’s face, or the cold treatment I’ve given to someone who doesn’t deserve it. I wanted to go back and do everything differently.

I wanted to not send that text, or tell them I cared. Maybe if I changed that one moment, things right now would be different. I’d probably be happier.

Tonight I did one seemingly grand gesture (for me at least) that made the heavy weight I’ve been carrying around my shoulders a little lighter.

I asked if we could be friends again.

What if we became friends again?

Well then we’ll just have to wait and see where this goes.

He said yes by the way.

Notes